 Says here that Michael Jackson checked into a hospital yesterday.Does it say why?  | They’re calling it a "flu-like illness."Oh, I see. I don’t suppose this means they’ll be putting his trial on hold? | Guess so. Say, I’m not feeling so well myself.You’re not getting out of Tantric Sex Night that easily.No, really, I think I’m going to vomit.  |
I’ve been wondering.Are we Australian, or are we American?Hmm...  |   | Well?Sorry, I was thinking about Mel Gibson.  |
 Why are you so chipper this morning? | Admit it. Last night, you made sounds you’ve never made before.Ha. | That you’ve heard, anyway. |
| You know I’ve,.. stopped wearing underwear. | Yes, I realised that. | That’s why I’ve started wearing double. |
’Twas the nght before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring,   | Except for the angry wife stalking her husband with a shiny new axe after discovering her moisturiser had been replaced with...something else. | He-e-e-e-re’s Johnny!Run away! |
| Ow...Honey I’m home!He slurs drunkenly after staggering through the screen door...at 6am no less.Sweety, I can explain. I was out drinking with the boys when I met this hot chick and well, one thing led to another and we ended up going at it hammer and tong all night. I’m really sorry. | Right...and my uncle Noel DOESN’T have carnal knowledge of animals. What really happened?OK, ok. I was out drinking with the boys and after we got chucked out at closing time, they thought it would be a good idea to duct tape me to the nearest roundabout....again. | Oh Tyler, you could have at least put on clean underwear before you left yesterday.*sniff* *sniff* |
| | I need a better hiding place for my invisibility potion don’t I?Maybe. |